Exotic wedding is too much
DEAR DIANE
By Diane Verhoven

DEAR DIANE:

My daughter, "Gretchen," is 36 years old and engaged to be married to a successful man, "Gerald." This will be the second marriage for both of them. Gerald works in the pharmaceutical industry and Gretchen is in real estate. Since both of them are financially secure and have no children, they have more than their share of discretionary income.

Here's the problem. Gretchen and Gerald have decided to hold their wedding in Africa - at the top of Mount Kilimanjaro. They say they want an exotic wedding and adventure for all their guests.

I say they're nuts.

The cost of traveling from the U.S. to Africa is pretty steep, and many of the people who wish to attend the wedding are over 60. Even if they could afford the trip, how are they going to climb an 18,000-foot high volcano?

When I suggested someplace closer to home, Gretchen countered with Paris.

As the father of the bride, I want to be able to walk my daughter down the aisle (or slope, as the case may be). What I think she fails to see is that she is isn't going to have the wedding of her dreams if no one shows up to witness it.

What can I do?

- SAD DAD IN DURHAM

DEAR SAD DAD:

There really isn't much you can do at this point. You've already tried to talk some sense into those two, and they aren't going to change their minds - until they send out the invitations and no one replies.

When Gerald and Gretchen realize that 90 percent of their invitees aren't going to play along with their outrageously expensive fantasy, they will wise up and scale down their plans.

Another option is for you to suggest that they hold a smaller ceremony in town for those family members and friends who can't make the Africa trip.

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